UPDATE May 12th:

I am feeling kinda off lately. The suddenly warm and humid early sumemr weather is really getting to me.
Constant tiredness, insomnia and a very short fuse isn't helping matters. I have an anger problem, always had, but right now I have trouble keeping it in check.
I also managed to twist my ankle yesterday. The already injured one. Yeah, I am that good.

Finished another commission. But I am not sure how far it gets us. Now I am kinda out of commissions. Anyone commissions me would be great. I might even be able to draw big cats. I have been practicing a lot lately, as you see.

We also ran out of food. I could take a bit of money from my paypal, but it takes a while until it is on the bank account. I don't complain. I just had a very interesting experience. Made me think. THe cupboards are empty, really, we used up everything we had in store. So today I literally broke bread with my girls. I shared my bread with them. I dunno, but doing that had some kind of close feeling to it. I'd rather starve then to see my girls suffer.
My family grows smaller and smaller by the years. And not because relatives die, no because they turn their back on us. Now I am used to it, some of them never counted me, didn't deem me worthy of anything, unless I was useful for something.
But my mother? She did more then most people I know in her life, managed to raise four children under bad circumstances. Basically it ended with someone we considered close saying she was a liar. I was pissed. She literally had to hold me back. Otherwise I would have done something regretable. And most likely illiegal.
And now she still is in not much of a better situation. Because of me. Because she wants me do what I want to do.

Over the years I only had her and K in my back. And now I look around and see how much people care, people I have never met, constantly encouraging me to keep going.

I wish it was over already. So I can pay back everything that has been given to me. And I don't only mean monetary support. I mean everything.

I guess you have to suffer my occassional whining and sudden emotional outbursts for a while longer. But trust me when I say, you won't get rid of me so easily. I always come back. I'm like the extra hot chilli you shouldn't have eaten. I alway come back at the worst possible moment. c:
And don't get fooled. I am a narcissistic and egoistical asshole. I just manage to hide it well enough. I also like my ego stroked. Which is bad, and sounds even worse.

Also, I am still taking commissions. *shameless advertising*



---------------------------------------------------

UPDATE: May 4th:

Still here. Sadly. Things are drawing to a close. I hope. The money that's left will last till mid of june, probably.
I still have two commissions. But one of them is too huge, I won't be able to finish it for awhile. And the second one, well I haven't heard of the commissioner in a while. I am waiting for a response. Not paid yet (because I ask for payment once I finish my coms).

So yeah. I might take a one or two small commissions. If someone is interested, you can find the pricelist at the end of this journal.

My ankle is acting up again. I overdid it the last few days a bit.
I am also in kind of an emotional low right now. Family isn't helping. I might be overreacting, but I feel a bit left out. I had to bite back a lot of things the passed month, keeping my chin up and being patient, I let it slip for one day and I get stuff thrown at me.
I just feel bad.

Work on AKitD continues meanwhile. Not like I have besides coms anything else to do. :/

I am also most likely starting to crosspost stuff here and on another account. I really want to move (I HATE this username >:C), but I also don't want to abandon this account and the thousands of watchers and my DDs. :C But so far dA hasn't provided a means of merging/renaming accounts.

I will never abandon this account completely. But I might split stuff up. Using this for my anthro art and the other one for wolves and the wolves comics. Or I dunno.

I just don't feel right, so yeah. Keep me in your prayers. And hope that it soon will be over and worth all the waiting.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


UPDATE: April 15th:

Still alive and still working on commissions. By now I have three commissions left I am still working on.

It is mid-april. I said I have to get money to get till april, sadly not the beginning of april. It looks like it will take till end of arpil/early start of june until things change. Until I HOPE they change. Keep me in your prayers guys, because what I am going to do is basically staking everything on one card.  
Keep me in your prayers, because if I fail, I don't know what I can do. .-.

On another note, last few weeks have been shitty. Ankle is still not healed yet and the presence of a certain person made me so angry that I spent three straight hours screaming profanities at inanimated objects and random passer-bys. :c
Not many details that might interest you, it mostly involved insulting my family and calling me worthless behind my back. Not making it better I am basically related by blood to said person. Doesn't matter. It just makes me grumpy right now. That and the time. Let's say I am very restless right now because of it. And scared shitless to be honest. *sigh*

Well, enough emotional crap. I need to keep working on these remaining commissions, all of them are pretty huge and demanding. So don't expect too much new artwork from me.
I am still excepting smaller commissions, lineart commissions, icon or bustshot commissions.
Pricelist can still be found here: [link]

For now, over and out.

CJ Andrews


------------------------------------------------------


UPDATE: 7 March:

Long time no see. You guys deserve an update.
So far we are still alive. Sadly my foot is still sore, although it gets better, even if slowly.
Job-wise I still cannot work and also haven't found any work, work I can do or otherwise.

I still take commissions. My prices are negotiable, as always. Paypal only though.
I have updated my Commissions pricelist. You can find it here, if you are interested: [link]
I still take commissions, although for this week I have alot to do. But that shouldn't keep you from droping me a note, if you are interested.
In case you want to donate, my paypal address is: yedaji_nikopol@yahoo.com

Thanks to all of you I made enough money that we won't starve this month. But I need to make a bit more, since I have no idea how long into april it will take.

Hopefully it won't take long anymore, because I am not sure how long I can hold on.

I am thinking about you whenever I make myself a cup of tea. I cannot say how much the help I got so far means to me. 's to all.


Advertisment:

ask me to promote her taking commissions as well. She seems to be in a pickle, how badly I am not sure. But I know she makes some neat realistic wolf images. So if you are interested in a cheap commission, take a look at her list here: [link]

And we are now offering Collabissions (collab commissions) .
*SkytheNova makes the outlines, I do the colors. Here is an example of what it looks like together:
For the collabissions *SkytheNova's pricelist works, which means, we will do werewolves as well (since she does the sketches anyway).
Anyone interested can note either me or *SkytheNova.


------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


EDIT: Thanks everyone so far. I am glad to see how many people care. Even the ones who cannot commission me or donate money left encouraging words. ANd god knows I can need them now.
I earned a bit money through the commissions. Enough to at least last us through this month (especially my dogs).

I am still taking commissions to get enough money for the coming month.
And I am still looking for a job. My ankle is still swollen and the ligament is mostlikely imflamed by now. I am very careful with my ankle since I already had two sport-related accidents where my ligaments were nearly ruptured. They have become my weak spot now. :/
But I try to not give up. If I can get a few more commissions I might be able to make it. It will be tough, but you all have been a huge help.

I am very greatful for that. Thanks all.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

PLEASE READ ALL!

I have actually no idea what to write.

Shortly after my last journal (the hiatus one) a few things happened which really suck.
I don't want to go so much into detail (way too emberassing in my opinion) but bottom line is, my life sucks right now.

Now that is nothing new maybe, but right now I am in deep shit, because I have no idea how to survive the next few month (looks like I need to be able to survive till april).

So on to the problem, it is money related. Again. Yeah I know, now you groan in frustration. But really, it is a huge problem.

The thing is, beginning of january I had an accident which left my complete left side heavily bruised. I couldn't sleep on that side or move properly. My left hip, left side of back, left elbow, upperarm and shoulder as well as both knees and my left ankles looked like shit. But the worst was my left ankle. I already had two sportrelated accidents on both my ankles when I was younger, so they always have been my weakness. But this time it just takes the cake. My ankle was so badly bruised (palm-sized dark violet-nearly black bruising) that I thought it might actually die off. (I was in the hospital, they said it would heal overtime)
Yet I still went to work with it. But apparantly the guy that calls himself my boss wasn't amazed and I lost my job (not because of the injury alone, jsut because he is a jerk and wants to save money).
Three weeks later and it is still sore, aching and swollen. I can hardly move it let alone walk properly or stand for more than 5 minutes. So after loosing my one job I had left I now have no job and no new job in sight (since I cannot even stand for long). I have barely enough money to pay my healthinsurance for another month (before you asked, we HAVE to have healthinsurance, no way to get out of that).
But since I have to pay that, we barely have 50€ for food each month, for two people and two dogs.
I can't even afford the medication to make my ankle heal better. :c

Now since it is hopefully only till april we most likely are going to survive (still it sucks to not even have tea to drink), but I am worried about my girls. I need around 15€ for dog food (two rather large dogs and since it is only 8°C in our house I have to feed them more) and I cannot pay for both, our food and their.
I already tried everything, salvation army and all, so don't even try to suggest that. It is not the first time we are in trouble. But I will not give them away (only place to do that would be a shelter and I WON'T DO THAT! As I got them I promised I won't give them away no matter what. And now after 8 years with them I'd rather starve then give them up >:C)

So, bottom line, I need money. I take everything, donation, commissions, all. You are even welcomed to send me food. I don't care.
So far I have two commissions I need to finish (one paid, one unpaid) and one finished commission I still waiting for the last payment. (takes a little long though).
But I will take small commissions now (paypal only ). Only feral creatures though, with shading and no background or abstract background. Prices are on a basis for negotiation.
Examples: One char, shading, no bg (the bottom one):
One char, shading (or gradientshading), abstract bg:

In case you want to donate, my paypal address is: yedaji_nikopol@yahoo.com